Relationship Confusion

Why is it that when it comes to our own lives, we forget to take our own good advice?

Well, that’s what I’m finding out about myself. With hindsight, I can see it all so clearly. Still, when I am in the middle of an emotional conflict with my boyfriend, my judgement becomes clouded, and I lose my centre. I have been with this guy for two years, and I really do love him, but somehow, we always end up having massive arguments, and I am always to blame. He convinces me that I am wrong, and I find myself apologizing, but deep inside, I know it’s not right. How can I always be wrong? Of course, I am sometimes, but a relationship is a two-way street. We have broken up five times, and I go back to him each time. I know that I am so clear about why when I break up with him. However, it doesn’t take long before I find my reasons for leaving him are less important than my love for him.

My family find it very difficult, and I find myself more isolated as they disagree with how he behaves. If it were a friend of mine doing this, I would tell her to leave and to break it up once and for all, but I seem to find myself back with him. He promises he will change and always does his best in the beginning, and then the cracks start reappearing. I want him to be my forever person, and I am determined to give everything I have to make our relationship work. I know what is right, but I still find myself with him at the end of the day. I suppose time will tell.